Yesterday, social media was chockfull of tributes to fathers,
grandfathers, step-fathers, maybe-fathers, and fathers-to-be. Durex, the British manufacturer of “prophylactic
sheaths,” had a commercial out yesterday that said “To all of you out there
that used our competitors’ products…Happy Father’s Day.” Let’s face it, Father’s Day is less intense
than Mother’s Day. There are no FTD
commercials, because most dads aren’t into receiving roses (at least I hope
not). Children and spouses express their
love through meats on a stick, golf clubs, corn hole matches, and trips to the
local waterpark. As a display of
affection and appreciation to me, my wife (ahem, and kids) bought me some
Smores-flavored cotton candy………
Yesterday marked my eighth Father’s Day as a father. I spent much of the day piloting a GMC Yukon full
of people from Charlotte, NC. The night
before we attended the wedding of a lifelong friend; therefore, my brain
synapses were only intermittently connecting throughout the ride. However, I did have some time to reflect on
being a father and what exactly it means.
Fathers are protectors of the household. Now, I’ll admit when I hear a knock in the
night, I ask my wife to go check it out, but the overarching presumption is
that big-bad-Dad will be the one scaring the robber off in his whitey-tighties. When something goes wrong with a child,
fathers desperately want the child to say, “I’m going to tell my dad.” We want to protect the child AND
ourselves. A hurt and whiny child is
much easier to deal with when he or she is not coupled with an angry mom/wife!!
You hear people say all of the time that so and so was a father figure
in my life. You may hear them called a nurturer. What I say is that a father and/or
father-figure is an enabler. Outside of
jumping out of an airplane, being a snake-charmer, or rock climbing anything
over five-feet tall, I will try anything that my children have an interest in
doing. (Yes, I know people….I left out
the running a marathon part). I want to
enable them to be curious about all things.
Payback may come in about 14 years when my daughter shows an interest in
French fashion or something.
Lastly, despite all of our faults and foibles, we are simply entertaining
and frustrating figures. You do not have
to dig deep into most fathers to discover they are still that same 12 year old
kid. Guys remark all the time that we
can go ten years without seeing one another and still catch back up like we are
sitting on the fraternity house front porch.
Just before my first child was born, I struggled with the whole growing
up thing. Then, I came to the conclusion
that I will likely never grow up. Now I
have an eight-year-old son that is completely normal (I think). When he goes to the convenience store to pick
up some Nerds candy, I ask that he pick me up some of the same. My wife, and most mothers out there will
admit, that fathers are just as frustrating as the kids they produce!! Keep it up, men!!
All of us have or had a father or father-figure in our life. Be thankful for the time you got to spend
with that hero. Give your mother the
recognition that she deserves, but don’t forget that dear old dad is only
slightly more mature than you. I am
surrounded by friends that are great fathers.
We will never win the James Dobson award for parenting, but we try our
hardest to be the protector, the enabler, and the entertaining and frustrating
men that we are. Happy Father’s Day to
you all, and especially to my dad, Randall………The Godfather of Leisure.
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